Even George Bush, caught in an off-handed moment as he returned from a bike ride in Crawford, Texas, said, “I’m usually not a fan of movements, unless it’s a movement to elect me or some other Republican, regardless of how big a jackass he is. But, given the extent to which I’ve been suckered in in Iraq, this movement has a lot of appeal.”

“Why, George?” his wife inquired, when he lightly poked her with his elbow.

“I’m glad you asked that, Laura,” he told her. Then, sounding every bit like a born-again American, he admitted, “I know my job is to protect Americans. I used to think that means kicking butt militarily. Now, I think it’s to kick butt economically, especially before Detroit goes completely out of business and China opens up factories in every nonaligned nation before we get around to it. So I’ve asked my speechwriters to help me make the transition. I want to tell every nation, ally or not, and especially the ingrates at that Fidel fest in Cuba, look here: you want us to help your nation do better, what are you willing to ante up? We accept two kinds of payment: money from the rich and loyalty from the poor.”

In an unusual sign of political amity, Ted Kennedy took off a moment from his usual disgruntled bluster over one ineffectual Democratic advocacy or another, and said, “As you know, I came from a wealthy family, so I’m aware that economic success comes with a lot of perks. Right now, we’re squandering our resources, while other countries are eating our lunch. Before it’s lights out in America, because we can’t pay the electric bill anymore, we need to concentrate on the only thing that can make the country successful enough to take care of its own poor, not to mention its potholes, and that's worldwide economic leadership.”

Dick Cheney, interviewed at an undisclosed location while cleaning his quail gun, said, “I’ve been in Washington so long I almost forgot what it’s like to be a good businessman. This movement made me think, hey, I’m the kind of guy who can get this right, because what is really called for is the biz savvy to conduct America, Inc. Now that I caught on, I may even consider running for president in ’08, providing, of course, my stent holds out.”